I remember when it started – November 25, 2002. Alan Partridge made friends with Lexus-driving, Lynx Voodoo-wearing kitchen magnate Dan Moody, played by the brilliant Stephen Mangan. He combined a handshake with a business card and when Alan informed him his mobile phone was a Motorola Timeport he remarked ‘that’s saaad, you want to upgrade’. Not only was Dan cool, he was right.

I thought I owned the ultimate Moody mobile in the shape of a Sony Ericsson T68. Colour screen, Bluetooth connectivity, tri-band compatibility and an icy metallic finish. Ahead of its time, it was even James Bond’s burner of choice. In reality it took another five years before finding the kind of handset desirable enough for the owner of Kitchen Planet, and as a result ever since 2008 I’ve used an Apple iPhone.

Delving ever deeper into the Apple ecosystem over the next decade its suite of services from iTunes to… iTunes, the iPhone became the centre of my world and to entertain leaving iOS for Android felt like switching back to a Motorola Timeport, swapping Lynx Voodoo for Java, becoming Alan.

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